Cry If You Need To
by kylagarrett
Summary: "What was he supposed to say? Cry if you Need to but I can't stay to watch you that's the wrong thing to do? Touch if you Need to but I can't stay to hold you that's the wrong thing to do? Talk if you Need to but I can't stay to hear you that's the wrong thing to do? Because he'll say he loves her and she'll end up lying and say I love you too.
1. Please don't be scared of me

Cry if You Need to Chapter One.

I do not own Teen Wolf

She's staring into his eyes. He's staring right back at hers. She doesn't shift uncomfortably like the rest of them do. Nope, she holds his gaze like it's his life in her dainty hands. Her breathing is so slow, that he questions if she's about to die. Their knees are touching but they don't seem to notice. Their used to being so close. They cling to each other like a moth to a light bulb. Her leg is slightly bended, resting on his hip as he rubs his thumb over her smooth skin.

"Stiles," She says so quietly. But he hears it anyway. How could he not hear they way his name sounds on her lips? It's like peaceful soft music to his ears. It's like a taste of honey on his lips. He imagines that her lips will taste like honey one day. When she decides that she wants to kiss him again. He gives her all the benefits you can possibly give a person. She once asked him in a quite voice, what would a benefit be? He replies, anything you want.

He doesn't have to hum for her to know that's she got his attention. She always has it. Even if she doesn't ask for it, she still has it.

"Do you ever feel," She begins. She chokes on her own words. Almost like she's scared to ask the question. Stiles hates that word. He doesn't like the thought of some one being afraid of him. So he puts his hand on her back and brings her closer. She doesn't look down at the itty bitty space she has left between her legs, which Stiles grateful for. He's not trying to bring her closer to do some heavy grinding. No, that was the last thing on his mind. He brings her close to reassure her. And to reassure himself that there's nothing to be afraid of. He's reassuring her to know that she can touch him any way she likes. He's reassuring himself to know that he can be touched without harming anyone.

"Do you ever feel like your useless?" She asks. It's not the first times Stiles has been hit with that question, nor is it the first time he's ever felt like that. Stiles knows that she some times doubts herself. Stiles knows that she thinks her only power as a banshee is to cause people ear damage from her piercing screams. And Stiles knows that she secretly cried every night in her pillow when the pack couldn't figure out a way to save him sooner.

How does Stiles know these things? Because she's his emotional tether. Every time she's in pain or when she's crying; he feels it right in his gut. It's not exactly painful. It's more of a cold breeze surrounding him. He thinks back to two weeks ago. When the saved him. He had never been so grateful for air in his life. He had been suffocating. Every time strife and pain happened, it would layer over his body like a second skin, making it impossible to breath.

Stiles is so dazed. He's looking at her like she's the most important person in the world. He grins and nods, almost forgetting the question.

"I'm being serious." She says as she runs a cool hand over his scalp. Stiles guesses that's his punishment for not paying enough attention to her.

"Feeling useless isn't exactly a new thing for me Lydia," He says. His hand strokes her chin gently. She licks her lips as he continues explaining his thoughts.

"Some times I feel like I'm not the normal one in our pack. You start to feel like that when every one around you is different."

She stares at this boy that she has so much love and respect for in complete amazement. She stays silent as he begins to trace down her neck with his finger tip.

"How'd you do it?" She asks. Stiles immediately knows what she's talking about. But he doesn't stop tracing around her body. They've become so close. So close that she doesn't look down once when he traces the inner curve of her breast.

"I mean," She wets her lips once more. "Weren't you scared?" She asks this because she's truly curious. How do you kill some one who could easily snap you like a twig? Some one who has caused so much pain? How could you not be afraid?

"That's the key right there Lydia. Fear. Fear is not real. Now I know that people say if you aren't scared of anything then you're not human."

But their not human. Stiles is not a human. He has a place in the pack just like everyone else. He's not a werewolf. He's not a hunter. He's not a banshee. He's the most powerful piece on the chest bored. They would be clueless without him.

He's their emissary.

"Fear is not real. Fear is the thing in the back of our minds telling us to run. Fear is apart of our imagination that's telling us to be afraid. But I'm not afraid anymore."

Lydia has a glint in her eyes. She's finally found him. Her missing puzzle piece; she's complete.

Stiles grabs her hips and closes the itty bitty space that was separating them.

He has a thought, however scary. About that night with the bugs and the dirt. Why was she digging? What did she bury before her hands pulled him from underneath.

"I would not ask you where you came from. I would not ask you, neither should you." Lydia says with a content smile on her face. Stiles smiles back as a tear falls across the bridge of his nose.

"Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips." Stiles sings along. This is their song. This is the song that was playing that night. At the formal. A night that Lydia had recently revisited.

"We should just kiss like real people do." Lydia finishes the chorus as Stiles wipes his tears with his shirts sleeve.

He falls asleep in Lydia's arms that night. He has his impossibly cold feet touching her ankles. That takes Lydia back to the night when they had rescued him.

Scott had gone home for the night but Stiles stayed behind and waited for the Chinese food that she promised him.

When the food had finally got there she sat his plate in front of him as she watched over his shoulder waiting for him to take a bite. He looks over his shoulder at her and she apologizes, making him laugh. She goes to sit in front of him and watches him eat. He stuffs him mouth and moans a little. "I take it its good." She jokes.

Stiles laughs which makes her feel warm inside. "Shut up." He says even though he's still smiling. She garbs his hand and flinches at the contact.

"You're freezing." She says. He nods but still continues to eat his food. He starts sopping up his shrimp fried rice because it's all gone.

"You know there's more right?" She asks gesturing to his empty plate. He ignores her snide comment.

"Can I take a shower?"

Lydia nods and curses at herself for looking to eager.

She gives him some pajamas her dad had left by accident as his clothes spin in the washer.

Their randomly talking about old memories. It's stupid that their laughing about Stiles and Derek being trapped in the pool by Jackson.

They have sex that night. Lydia doesn't feel weird about it at all. But they don't speak about it. They don't even bring it up. But she's seen Stiles so many times this week. Much more are to come.

Lydia is finally at peace with herself. She's finally stopped blaming herself for not saving him sooner. She's not sure about what they are. But she's knows that she's in love with him.

Maybe she's just over doing it. Maybe she's just his security blanket. Maybe she's lost him to some one else.

She's willing to find all of these things out. She's willing to wait for him just like he waited for her. She's losing her right to be wrong.

She's frightened to death; she's frightened that she won't be strong. She then remembers what Stiles said earlier.

Fear is not real.


	2. She's back

Lydia ties to put on a brave face as she places a black beanie over her long straight hair. She ponders as flashes of her pack, that's waiting for her, flashes before her eyes. She straightens her shoulders, holds her head up high before walking out of her house. Not even bothering to tell her mother where she's going. She walks, almost jogs, up to the jeep. Once she gets in, she can almost smell the fear dripping from them. So she swallowes it. Because they have done so much for her that it's ridiculous. So, yeah, her whole pack is afraid so she swallowes the fear, the only thing she really should be drinking is an ice beer.

But she's grateful for her pack. They are so very different from those people at school. Those people don't understand her. They don't like the jeans sh some times likes to wear. They don't understand her hair. They don't know what it's like to constantly have this overwhelming fear that one of your friends, or famliy is about to die.

It's enough, she's done all she can think of. She's tired of thinking of all the things that make her sad. She has enough enough sad memories that cause her head to pound for a lifetime.

So, she turns to some one that makes her happy. He's has on a black hat, much like her's, and his face is scrunched up in thought. She knows that he can feel her heavy gaze on him.

She's surprised that she's not scard of him. He's not as bad as a nogitsune but that situation left him with nothing but a temper. A bad temper.

She knows it's crazy but some times she imagines what it would be like to be married to him. She never imagined that with Aiden. Because he didn't say she looked beautiful when she didn't.

She knows that the thing with Aiden wouldn't laugh. Stiles used to tell her all the time. He goes, 'If a man can't except a woman in sweatpants, he sure as hell doesn't deserve her in a wedding dress'. Lydia just thinks that that is just brilliant.

They stop. Lydia gets stopped from thinking any further. Stiles runds his hands together. "Alright, lets do this shit."

"Wait, Lydia i have to-" Lydia stops Kira mid-sentence.

"Don't say you have to pee."

"I won't say it." The car fills with groans.

"Kira, I told you to go before we left." Lydia says sounding a little muffled because her head is in her hands. The boys het out of the car and Lydia follows.

"I'll just hold it." Kira rolls her eyes before exiting the car. They all reach the woods. Lydia tries to make a joke to lighten up the mood but fails epically.

"You know, i have finally figured out what is wrong with you people."

"Oh yeah? And what is that?" Stiles asks sort of out of breath because of the steep hill that their cliimbing.

"Yes. You people do not know how to have fun. There, some one had to say it." Kira stops, panting slightly.

"Ok, i really have to pee. I might just go on myself." They see an ankle boot step out from behind a tree near them.

"Look at the bunch of four." Kate lets herself be shone in the moonlight, presenting herself back from the dead with a snide comment. She holds her hands behind her back, as if hiding some thing.

They all stare at her in return. All to afraid to even come back with a snarky comeback.

All except for Lydia.

"I'm sure you know about your niece." Lydia says. She can see the confident muscels in Kate's body tense at the mention of Allison. Lydia's do the same. But trust her, she wouldn't be bringing up her best friend if she knew it wasn't a sensitive subject for Kate.

Scott changes the subject.

"We'll do whatever we have to to get rid of you just like we did the rest. We'll team up with Derek's pack, we'll get Deucalion-" Scott gets cut off with Kate throwing what was behind her back at Scott. Scott stumbled back and the object came to a stop at his foot. Scott jumped back, disgusted. Lydia stepped over and flashed her phone light on the object. There sat, a lifeless, disgusting, head ripped off a body.

Deucalion.

"Oh. My. God. That is gross. Get that away from me." Stiles whined. He grabbed Kira by her waist and her pactically used her as a she sheld.

"Who is that?" Kira asked. And for a moment, Lydia forgot that Kira is new to all of this.

"That's Allison's uncle. She killed half of Derek's family, tried to kill me and Derek, but Derek's uncle, Peter, killed her." Scott said. Kira toke a moment to process the back story but slowly nodded.

"Why'd you kill him?" Kira asked.

"Well, younge Kitsune I actually did you guys a favor. He was planning on coming back full attack so I toke down him and his whole new pack." She did a simple shrug.

Lydia was getting tired of her being so calm. Not showing a bit of sympathy for tauting her now gone niece. It bothered Lydia in a way she couldn't understand. How Kate acted like she felt mo kind of sympathy or remorse whatsoever.

"Just so you guys know I'm here for Peter, but don't get me wrong, i'll kill anything that gets in my way. Including you guys and Derek. Now i did you guys a favor by taking Deucalion off of your list of problems, and i think i deserve one back."

"So you threatin us, then ask for a favor?" Stiles says still from behind Kira.

"Sorry, we don't know where he is." Scott says. He looked back at Lydia and silently told her to get behind him. Every knows that she has a connection with Peter that she doesn't want nor does she understand it. She can feel whenever he's traveling. It's kind of like she can see through his eyes.

In one quick motion Kate is coming towards.

"I don't think it's broken, just sprained." Ms. MCcall says.

"I'm going to give you a bandage and a cast, try to stay off your arm for the next two weeks." Lydia nodded before looking over at Scott whose eyes were filled with worry and sympathy. Lydia smiled at him.

"It's not your fault."

"Yes it is, he could have done some thing." Stiles said. Scott clenched his jaw and glared at him.

"You know i tried." Just then, Ms. MCcall came in, a confused look on her face and a file in her hand.

"Do any of you guys know a Kate Argent?"


End file.
